There are many blog articles on how to dress appropriately during a wedding. On our website, you can find articles on choosing the perfect wedding dress, choosing the perfect bridesmaids dresses, what to wear as the mother of the bride, and much, much more. These are commonly asked questions and so we have done our best to ensure that no stone has been left unturned. Yet I was chatting to a friend this weekend who is getting married and she asked me a question that was a little delicate, a little tricky, and something we had not covered yet. What about the step-mother of the bride?
Let’s face it, traditional wedding ideas are made for a traditional family. Yet the family that is often represented in magazines is not always the one that exists. Families are complicated and there are often strange relationships that need to be taken account of. One of these potentially awkward situations is the step-mother of the bride. With our help, it won’t be any more awkward than it has to be.
The wedding day is an incredibly important day for the bride but also for her mother. The day is usually ruled by these two people and that should be understood. It sounds harsh to say it but if you are the mother of the groom this day is not as important for you. If you are the step-mother of the bride it is even less important. Of course, this is all based on the idea that there is still a natural mother of the bride and that she is involved with the bride. There are many situations where the step-mother of the bride is like a natural mother and she should be treated as such.
If the step-mother is there as the partner of the father of the bride then she should know she is not technically part of the wedding party (unless asked to be). This means that she will often be with all the members of the wedding party but not strictly part of it, it can be confusing. In terms of dress code, she should try to wear colors that are in line with the wedding party (take note of what the mother of the bride is wearing) but wear something far more subdued. It is crucially important that the step-mother of the bride does not upstage the mother of the bride or the bride herself. This clearly means that things like white or whatever color the bride is wearing are not allowed. It also means that you shouldn’t dress exactly like the mother of the bride (as that opens you both to funny remarks). Instead, if the mother of the bride is wearing let’s say, a purple garment you could choose something of a similar palette like a maroon but in a more subdued form.
A wedding is a happy time and a moment for celebration. However, most of us are aware that when we combine extended family and lots of alcohol it can be a recipe for disaster. Be wary of the day that is ahead. Try and be respectful of the mother of the bride as it is an important day for her and her child. Ensure that you are kind and considerate and if conflicts do arise always be the one to swallow pride and walk away.
If you follow this advice we are certain that your stepdaughter will have an incredible day and that is really all that matters. A wedding is a high-pressure situation where everyone is full of nerves. Do your best to take away from the pressure by performing your role (or lack thereof) to the best of your ability.